This morning I grabbed a hot ham and cheese croissant from my oven, a fresh cup of coffee, and headed to my writing desk. It’s been a really long time since I sat down at that desk, away from the noise of CNN and actually put some words down on “paper”. I had all these words jumping around the inside of my head, and they needed to be let out. So I quite literally wiped off an inch of dust from the desk and opened WordPress. As I watched WordPress load, I remembered about a week ago, getting an email from GoDaddy stating they were kind enough to automatically update my blog to the newest version of WordPress; I didn’t give it much thought other than opening my website and making sure it all loaded, which it did.
Fast forward to those words bouncing around in my brain and me sitting at my desk. I took a bite of that croissant, a sip of coffee and watched as WordPress opened. GAHHHHH there it was staring me in the face, “Your How to Guide” to the new version of WordPress. I mindlessly clicked through the “tutorial” while I watch CNN updates flash on the corner of my screen, keeping me updated on the latest with Michael Cohen. Before I knew it, Michael Cohen was going to jail for three years, my croissant was gone, and I had finished the tutorial. I opened up a new document to set those words free and just screamed, for the third time this morning, at my computer, cursed GoDaddy, and questioned my new occupation as a writer. I had to step away from the computer and refill my coffee cup. As I sat there waiting on the coffee machine, I wondered to myself, why is it so hard for me to learn new things? I hate when things change, which is interesting since my life is constantly changing. Perhaps the constant changing is why I need the simple things to stay the same. It’s why if at this very moment you looked at my phone or my computer you will find no less than 45 updates, just sitting there waiting, patiently, for some attention. Attention I can’t give them, because of the end result. I don’t have the energy to relearn how to use the most basic program. I need it to work the same as it did when I shut off whatever device.
It turns out I must not be the only one who resists change with every fiber in my body, because as I scrolled down the “help” page of my shiny new WordPress, I found a button that let me go back to the old version until 2021. “That isn’t near enough time” I said out loud to no one in particular as I clicked that button, perhaps a little too hard and as I sat and watched that rainbow wheel spin around, bringing me back to the past, I wondered, “Can you really teach an old dog new tricks.”
I am here to say, probably, if it’s a younger dog, which I suppose means no, no you can not teach an old dog new tricks. In a world that is constantly changing, I need things to be the same, which means I am not open to learning new things. But I should note here that the new things I am not willing to learn are mostly technology based. I am 100% open to learning things like how to safely use a skateboard or how to fly a drone good enough to enter the FAI Drone Racing World Cup. But give me a new computer program to learn, and you will find me in the corner, holding a cross, and some stolen rosary, shouting Exorcixamus you omnis immundus spiritus!
Maybe 2019 will be my year to learn something new; maybe it will be my year to update all those applications on my phone and computer or, just, maybe it won’t.