Five days into my month off has made me realize that’s all I need to be rested. With the tour “retooling” itself, our next stop is unclear at the moment, and I am here, on my couch, asking the question “now what?”. Seems like I should get that question tattooed on my arm. However, this time around there is more comfort in wondering “what now.” I am comfortable sitting on my couch on this rainy Tuesday looking out the window, drinking a cup of coffee and watching them build the apartment right across the street. I am comfortable with the fact that the only thing on my agenda yesterday was catching up with The Walking Dead and lunch with Alison. I am comfortable with the fact that the only thing on my agenda for today is to see my dear friends at Sweet 16th Bakery.
Today I feel like the question “what now” has become a cozy blanket that covers an old friend that is always there, pushing me to be a better person or me. It has taken me 48 years to be comfortable and happy with me, but I’m here, finally. I am comfortable with my weight, I am comfortable with my gray hair, I am comfortable in my marriage, I am comfortable with my past, and I am comfortable with the unknown.
I am comfortable, and I like it, I’ve discovered that being comfortable enables you to enjoy the little things in life. Like Rob pretending to do yoga in front of me while whistling show tunes. Like buying sheets. Like lunch with my kids or just sitting on my couch on a rainy Tuesday in my comfy pajamas, watching the rain.